Sex Education for the Kids – Pakistani perspective


Syllabus upgrade: Sexual health rights to be incorporated in curriculum

http://tribune.com.pk/story/594336/syllabus-upgrade-sexual-health-rights-to-be-incorporated-in-curriculum/

Disclaimer: This blog post is meant for adults (18+)

After reading above article on Express Tribune, here’s my view on the topic.

I tend to nip the evil in the bud. I usually don’t recommend half-hearted solution or don’t believe in temporary solution. If there has already been an incident of sex, there’s no way to redress it. We see all such absurdities in developed (liberal) societies, being open about sex, which is beyond our remotest imagination, that I can’t even mention here. Naturally, they don’t have any solution for it, unless they abstain from the practice of open-relationship. They talk about abortion for the very reason, thinking it would undo the damage, however, that tantamounts to even bigger crime of killing a human life. You know, in US, 10% of fetuses are aborted after 4 months of development. 50% of pregnancies are unintended. 1.2 million abortion took place in 2008. It’s so complicated for them now. Thanks God, we haven’t fully copied their lifestyle, although, our society is well on track of copying it.

My arguments against sex education to kids:

1. Let the kids remain kids, not push them into adulthood before age. The sooner they learn about anything, the sooner they try to experiment it. At that tender age, we can’t expect them to demonstrate control and understanding that we have. We simply need to tell the kids, not to be alone with the opposite sex or in fact anyone, not to show their private parts to anyone, instead of teaching them how reproduction system works and what good and harmful effect it would have morally. Let them enjoy being children. Yes indeed, when they are getting married, we should tell them about it and not when they’re 13. Humans are curious by nature, children foremost. If you’ve been a child, you know well, you want to try out everything, that you get to know.

Reproductive health education and services, especially sex and family planning education for young ... / Credits: Reuters

Do you know, how many lost their innocence after this session ?

2. If naively, we’ve exposed kids to such information, through Bollywood or Hollywood, the parents will have to bear its aftermath.

Some stats:
* There are 24, 000,000 porn website on the internet
* Pornography industry is estimated to be $60 Billion per year
* 2.5 billion emails per day are pornographic
* 11 year old is the average age of children watching porn.
* 70% of men aged 18-24 visit port sites.

Further, that’s obviously not an excuse, to tell them the whole story in detail. You cannot just exempt yourselves, saying I am helpless, and I can’t protect children, from learning things from society (TV, books or internet) which they shouldn’t. There are smart parents, who still control all such mediums. If you child get to know about sex from anywhere, that does not mean, he’s very smart and can handle it in the right manner. He’s still immature.

3. Such initiatives are usually foreign funded (through NGOs) with vested interested, just like this news. And those NGOs do what their donor agencies funds them to do. There are thousands of similar NGO’s working for birth control, abortion awareness, while such things are clearly prohibited in our culture. Our government is usually not qualified to understand, let alone know their motives. For sex education, western societies are mainly concerned about ‘Safe Sex‘, while we don’t have any place for sex in the first place. So, we have to be extra-careful about such initiatives and compel the Government to have stern scrutiny on such NGOs, so that their interest is not against our needs, values, culture and lifestyle. Acc. to this news, they plan to teach maternal health, AIDS, reproductive health, puberty, in fact virtually everything, to the 13 year old. Some would reach puberty at this age, some would not. These NGO’s are funded to campaign SRHR (Sexual and reproductive health and rights). I remember, some year back, one such NGO (promoting SRHR), were helping the sex-workers (how politely they coined that word, I remember), saving them from HIV/AIDS disease and providing abortion/contraceptive etc. Yes, in Pakistan, not US. So, right, we don’t need NGO’s to rehabilitate and support financially, these poor souls (girls), but we need NGO’s to soothe them, so that they continue to sell their body to earn living (which is illegal as per our constitution, culture and most importantly religion).

Remember this movie? They’re mainly concerned about Safe Sex, otherwise, see, they encourage sex (without marriage).

4. It spreads indecency, that’s not part of our culture or religious teachings. First, it makes it easy to discuss, then they do such things, as they develop the feeling that I can talk about it, parents will forgive us, if I do it by mistake. The more indecent you become, the less taboo such act gets and the less you fear about doing such things. It is a normal psyche, as long as you know snakes are dangerous that could attack you and their venom attack can kill you, you stay away from it. Once, someone starts to play with snakes and gets you involved with it, touching it, you tend to loose fear. Same analogy.  So, awareness should be made, but not in public, specially not co-ed and according to age and child’s physiological needs.

5. No wonder, Islam terms perpetrating extra-marital sex as a crime, awarding public exemplary punishment, because God knows, its implication, which is beyond the control of human being, which in turn destroys societies.

6. Has Sex education helped the developed world ? See some stats:

Of the women obtaining abortions in 2000:
* 57% had some college education;
* 88% were from metropolitan areas;

I am sure all these teenagers and children from cities, are well aware of sex and sexual implications, then why do 60% needs abortion ?

Solution:

We must make an environment, where there is less opportunity for individuals to have open-relationship, so that such incident are avoided in the first place. Here some more facts:

* 38% of rapist are a friend or acquaintance.
* Every 2 minutes someone in America is sexually assaulted.
* About 72% of eighth and ninth graders are “dating”.
* One in three adolescents in the U.S. is a victim of physical, sexual, emotional or verbal abuse from a dating partner.

Cartoon: sex education think of next (medium) by rmay tagged education,think,of,next

So, we should nip the evil in the bud (abstinence), instead of making ways to redress the situation afterwards, with abortion or sex education, birth control, etc. Redressing it afterwards could be kept for exceptional cases like 0.01%, not for 99% of the population should be taught about it, so it becomes easy for everyone to commit sex and get redressal, through accommodating society (hospital, parents, teachers, etc.).  While researching on this topic, I learned, NGO’s want to teach the kids that, sex between two women carries less HIV transmission risk than sex between two men. Why on earth would you want to teach this to your kids, except so that they know, there’s something like women to women sex. My goodness!

Sex related information needs to be provided to the individuals, but the content, environment, age and physiological needs of the child, should be very well taken into account. Not unlike what the western societies start of with kids aged 5 or 7 and in public groups, showing animated videos of reproduction. We do need to teach them about the anatomy and physiology of the human-body, about the act of sex and family life, about prevention of sexually-transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancy. They should be aware of the social, moral and religious ethics, how to avoid peer pressure, sexual growth and development, time table for puberty, physical changes during puberty, development of fetus and birth, needs of family life, reproductive system, for girls- organ, menstruation, premenstrual syndrome, for boys- the organ, the sex drive, fornication, adultery and punishments for them, and marriage, divorce, cleanliness etc. But all of that in a prescribed manner, conducive to our values. So, that’s why I have apprehension on these NGO’s, if they would tailor their funded campaigns according to OUR values or just bribe the govt. and complete the job as per the donor agencies mandate.

The fundamental reason for such rampant abuse, is the growth of liberal views towards open-relationships and exposure of sexual content to children, in movies, TV shows, books/magazines, internet and other mediums. We got to protect our children, which is our future and our obligation to the nature, to raise them properly.

Hear what scholars have to say about it:

Like most of our problems today, the solution can’t be as simple as I mentioned above, since there are many other factors involved.

Implications of free sexual relationship:
1. Lack of interest in marriages
2. Higher divorce rate
3. Early age pregnancy, birth
4. Identity of new born babies
5. Sex becomes trade
6. Girls end-up in such trade due to poverty and social acceptance.
7. Sexually transmitted diseases, eg AIDS

That’s my opinion on the topic, you’re welcome to share yours.

Another good read is:  How to cope with amoral ‘sex education’

http://en.harakahdaily.net/index.php/articles/edu-spective/1728-how-to-cope-with-amoral-sex-education.html

Further reading and sources:

http://www.academia.edu/453374/Sex_Education_An_Islamic_View

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Fedo3Zuwss

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CWm51uxhRfg

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